Alternative funerals

As a civil celebrant, I will support you in making fitting choices for an end-of-life ceremony that meets your needs. You might want to call it a funeral or a celebration of life. The word funeral suggests a more traditional act of mourning, whereas a celebration of life might be more modern, freer of convention, and/or focused on reflecting on the life of the individual.  I follow the language you wish to use and the style of ceremony you want.  

Sometimes people choose a direct cremation or burial, or a family-only cremation or burial, and have a ‘celebration of life’ for a wider group at a later date.  

What is an alternative funeral/celebration of life?  

My specialism is alternative funerals or celebrations of life in non-standard venues and natural burial grounds.  You might want to have a ceremony in your own home, at a pub, art gallery, in a field or other venue rather than at the crematorium. Choosing another type of venue enables you to have greater flexibility over the length and timing of the ceremony, and what you can do. You may wish to decorate or write messages on the coffin as part of the ceremony.  

If you are choosing a non-standard venue, then you will need to consider the access for bringing the deceased to the venue, as well as access for your guests.  I can help you work with your funeral director, if you are using one, and the venue of your choice.  

How will we work together in making the funeral ceremony perfect? 

I will arrange to meet with you, either at your home or another suitable venue (e.g. at the funeral director’s).  Sometimes we meet more than once.  I can also meet online or talk over the phone if you are making arrangements at a distance.  

We will spend time talking together about your deceased relative or friend, and your wishes for the ceremony.  It is important that I learn about their individual personality, as much as their life’s achievements, and how you want them to be remembered during the ceremony.  Not everyone’s life is straightforward, but everyone will be treated with dignity and respect.

Following our discussions, I will write their story for the tribute, if you want one.  I will always make sure you are happy with those words before the ceremony takes place.  I can support you should you, or other people, want to write your own tribute or anything else to be included in the ceremony.  

In creating the whole ceremony, I will help you choose the music for the start and end of the ceremony, and any music or hymns during the ceremony, if needed.  I can advise on readings (poems, religious texts) and the inclusion of prayers, if you want them.  You may wish to include a ritual, for example, lighting candles or placing flowers on the coffin.  

I can help you collate photos that might be displayed on a screen during the service for crematorium ceremonies too.  

Together we will discuss the order of service, and who might be speaking.  I will ensure that the details are put together in a timely manner for printing the order of service.  

What do I do on the day of the funeral ceremony?

On the day, I will be there to greet you at the ceremony venue that you have chosen.  I will support you, with your family and friends, through the ceremony.  I can read everything, or people can contribute, depending on what you have decided.  If on the day, someone doesn’t feel up to reading then I can step in to help.

What are the rules for a funeral?   

There are not any funeral rules, other than the deceased is treated in a respectful way.  You may choose to use a funeral director, or you might choose to undertake the funeral yourself and care for the deceased at home.  

A funeral ceremony or celebration of life can take place in a crematorium, natural burial site, in your home, or another venue.  Some people choose to have a celebration of life following an unattended cremation (direct cremation).  For others, it is important to have the ceremony while the deceased relative or friend is present in their coffin or shroud.  

There are many different types of coffins available, and you may be guided by your choice of burial site or crematorium.  You can also decorate a cardboard coffin with family and friends to make it a personal tribute too.  

Discover different types of funerals in my blog.  

You can also get useful information about arranging a funeral and using natural burial grounds, from the Natural Death Centre.

Can you plan your own funeral ceremony in advance?

Given that death comes to us all, planning for your own ceremony can help others when the day finally comes.  There may be many different reasons that prompt you to start planning for your own end of life ceremony.  You can consider where the ceremony could be held, as well as the content of the ceremony, and whether to choose cremation or burial.  

If planning your own ceremony is something you wish to do, I can help you put together ideas in a sensitive and reflective way, and can involve other family and friends of your choice in that process.  

What is a living funeral?

Some people want to hold a ceremony with their family and/or friends before they die. This ceremony is called a living funeral. You might choose a living funeral because you have a terminal illness, or your parent, spouse or friend has dementia. It is an opportunity to share memories, celebrate connections, and have time together.

I can help you create your living funeral ceremony and incorporate creative ideas for capturing the shared stories and memories on the day.

How much do my end-of-life ceremonies cost?

For Bristol or Bath crematoria and burial grounds, my end-of-life ceremonies are priced at: £300 for a 30-minute ceremony; £350 for 45 minutes, and £400 for a hour.   Prices are held for 2025.

Ceremonies held venues other than the crematorium or burial ground start from £400.

Please contact me for my full price list for alternative ceremonies, end-of-life ceremony planning, and living funerals.  

If you book me direct, I will invoice you and payment will be by bank transfer. A booking fee of £100, deductible from the whole cost, will be required.

How can you book me?  

You can book me to be your celebrant, whichever funeral director you use.  Just give me a call to book.

Celebrants do not work for the funeral director, as they are self-employed.  Many celebrants are recommended by the funeral director because they have an established working relationship. You do not have to use the recommended celebrant.  

Please do contact me for an informal chat to see if I am the right celebrant for you, and to check that I am available for your date.